You are now connected to Wafaa from Amazon.com.
Me:Where the hell is my order?
Wafaa:Hello. My name is Wafaa and I would be glad to assist you with regards to tracking your order.
Me:I check the fedex website and no update has been made since the 12th. You guys ALWAYS do this to me!!!!!!!!!!
Wafaa:I do apologize that you are experiencing problems with your order. Give me a moment, while I look into this for you.
Thank you for your patience.
Did you fall asleep or something?
Adding insult to injury.
Wafaa:From what I see on the account there are 2 shipments for this order. An email was sent on Sept 8th to inform you that part of your order was shipped for the following items: 30 Tie Organizer as well as the Pringles Potato Chips.
And according to the tracking information those items are currently in on your way to you. The items are currently at Smartpost Kansas City
Me:Did you read a single thing I wrote?
Wafaa:Yes I have.
Me:Don’t you see that my order is late?
Wafaa:Yes, I do see that the order is late and I am looking into this for you.
Me:What are you “looking into”? You have been of NO help to me.
Wafaa:I’m sorry your order didn’t arrive when you expected it.
Me:What kind of answer is that? What are you going to do to reprimand me?
You’re also incredibly slow!
Wafaa:With regards to your order for Crunch ‘m Munch toffee popcorn, its regarded as a special order. The reasoning behind this is that not many customers orders that particular item. In turn amazon needs to source the product from the manufacturer. An email will be sent to with regards to when the order will be shipped out.
Me:Hey GENIUS! I’m talking about the current shipped order that is late!
Are you serious right now????????
Wafaa:I’m sorry for your frustration with your late shipment and I’m going to do everything I can to help.
Me:What are you DOING?????
Wafaa:I’m sorry to hear you haven’t received your items yet. In my experience, late packages arrive soon after the estimated delivery date.
I’ll follow up with you to see if you’ve received the package after Sep 19, 2011. If you haven’t received your package at that time, I’ll make sure to get a replacement or refund for you.
Me:THIS IS COMPLETE BULLSHIT!!!!!!!